holiday feast

the church
would leave food on the porch
for the holidays.
somehow
they knew we didn't have
two sticks
to rub together.
i remember opening the door
and seeing
out in the cold
enough food
for a month of holidays.
potatoes,
a turkey, a fat ham,
vegetables,
the trimmings,
cider, milk, pies.
i woke my mother up to
tell her.
i remember her going to the door
and putting her
hand on her mouth,
her eyes looking around
the street for neighbors
eyes.
quickly she brought
it all into the house,
sobbing,
and me wondering why.