what was her name?

i tell the masseuse to dig deep.

she hops up onto the table
and puts her
knee into my bare back.

it's still not enough.
am i hurting you, she asks,

kneading and tugging
at my muscles.

no. i tell her. you don't know
what hurt is?

but she can't get to the  spot,
the muscle
tight and knotted
deep within me.

she can't seem to find it
with her elbows, her hands.

i feel the drops of her sweat
falling onto me.

she grunts as she keeps at it.

you are so tight and beaten, she
says. what has happened to you?

what was her name?