the things i used to know

I follow the path down to the stream.

and stare into
the blue grey sleeve
of water

rushing to where it needs to go.

mindless and yet correct.

I bend
to the edge of the water
and let my hand

fall into the cold flow.
I feel

the numbness in my hand,
down to the bone,
but keep it there.

I want more. I want to feel
the pain,
feel
the things that I used to know.