the dictator and his wife in captivity

they put the captured drug

dealing

dictator into a cell with his wife.

she's not

happy.

i don't like these blue pajamas

they gave me,

they are too loose

around the waist,

people will think i'm fat,

and that orange

jumpsuit you're wearing

is hurting my eyes.

what's with 

this yelling from the cell next

to us.

they sound like animals in

there.

farm animals making

wild love.

can you call down to the front

desk and see

what they can do about this,

plus, it's cold.

i think they should turn the heat

up and bring

in an easy chair so that i can knit.

you know

how i like to knit when we're

in trouble.

and do you mind, could you

stop pacing

for one minute,

i'm losing my marbles,

and quit leaving

the seat up on that toilet

over there.

can't you pay someone to get us

out,

what happened to all

of our drug money from the cartels?

it's been two days now.

i'm really hungry,

what time is dinner around here?