free fallling

I remember falling off a roof

and looking up at the pristine blue sky
for those brief
seconds

and thinking
this is it, I may die.

but I landed on my back, in dirt.
enough
to cushion the fall.

I lived.
no blood, no broken bones,
but the next few years I wondered,

as I went through hell
with someone, what was the point,

what lesson learned.
to what end. to live through this?

and then what.
is it all connected, or random.

does God roll dice with the universe
or not,

as Einstein once said.
is each trial a lesson, each fall
a part of the journey

to bring us to where we should be?