you have to promise

after my mother passed

away

while living in a semi

conscious state for five

years, curled in a ball

with her eyes blinking

yes or no, in hospice,

i remember

what she said to me and others

before she became ill.

don't ever put me in a home

like i've seen my friends

go to, she said.

don't ever take me there,

with only strangers around.

no matter what happens, you

have to promise me

that i won't end up there.

let me die in my own house, 

in my own bed, surrounded

by my own things. even

if i have no memory, if

i've lost my mind, if i can't

walk or move a muscle,

no matter what happens

don't let them take me there.

you have to promise.