small talk emoji

i laminate a bunch of words

onto

cards that i string around my

neck.

when someone asks me how

am i.

i flip to the card that says.

Fine, and you?

when they say, so how is your

day going so far, i find the card

that says, great, and you?

when they ask me what kind

of coffee i want, i flip

to that laminated card and

have a picture of a grande

americano on it.

i'm sort of done with chit chat.

and small talk.

when someone points out

that i have a splotch of ketchup

on my shirt.

i find the card that says, i know.

thanks for pointing that out.

then turn to the card with a 

smiley face on it.

i'm taking emojis to the next level.

i point at my throat and 

pretend to have laryngitis .

i find the sick emoji card.

i let a sound out that sounds

like ahhhh. which makes

them back away.

it's saving me so much time,

and useless conversations.

i flip to the card that says,

nice to see you, goodbye.

i turn to the hand wave emoji.

people need to get used it in

person, like that do in texting.