looking back

i think of last year
at this same time,
this day, this hour, this week.
curled
in a heap of bone crushing
anxiety,

disillusioned by the life i bought
into.
strange
and disembodied. My identity
Stolen. My world
Turned upside down
By a pathological liar.
Manipulated
And beaten down.

I was lost
in what i thought was love,
but had nothing to do with
love. I was
Duped and abused.
lost in
a quagmire of doubt, of fear,
of pain.
cringing at each new lie
That came out of her
Sick mouth,
each new betrayal
With her married boyfriend.

what a difference a year makes,
i think, as i look out across
the blue water, relieved
That her
Darkness is gone.
That the nightmare
Has ended.
At least for me
But not for her or
Those around her.that
Will never end
no matter how many years
go by.