the end of year evaluation

i call my

therapist up for an end

of year

evaluation

and tune up, not unlike

when

i take my

car in to the shop.

i tell her i'm having

a mid

life crisis.

which makes her laugh.

that would make

you a hundred

and forty

then, when you die, she says.

give or take,

i tell her.

i just need to vent a little.

talk about

my mother again.

i'm not sure if she even loved

me.

sometimes she'd forget

my birthday.

stop, she says, save it.

i'm in the middle

of stuffing olives

with cream cheese and

making punch.

okay, okay.

so when?

i have an hour open

on New Years Eve.

but bring a bottle

of champagne

and a party hat, okay?

the Dick Clark Times Square

show starts

at 7.

and if you could be a prince

and pick up

some onion dip on your way

over.

that would be nice.