the alimony negotiation

after catching

the ex

cheating and sleeping

with Carlos,

my son's karate teacher,

i filed for divorce

and then

i negotiated

the alimony down to two years,

making the audacious

claim

that she was capable of

work,

since she was

only 32 years old and had

a degree in

marketing.

it was a bitter fight.

she wanted

alimony for life, and half

of everything

i every made, and would

make until

the end of time.

this made

the judge laugh and laugh

and laugh.

he finally slapped

his gavel down 

and said no dice, 

but nice try Jezebel.