Monday, January 2, 2023

call me Ernestine now

i run into my old pal
Ernie in the grocery store.
we used to play
football together back in the day.
he was the first
one of our gang that had to shave
his face.
he had a deep voice,
and broad shoulders
from lifting weights.
he got all the girls.
but there's something different
about him now.
he's wearing a dress
and high heels, and what looks
like a blonde wig.
i swear to you he has breasts
too, not your little ones, either,
but Dolly Parton sized ones.
the thought crosses my mind
that he will never drown.
hey Ernie, i say, how are you?
been a long time.
did you see the game the other
night.
it's Ernestine now, he says
in his new whispery voice.
and i don't watch football anymore,
so violent.
he's looking at lipstick
in the cosmetic aisle.
what do you think, he says.
pink, or merlot?
i shrug, i like red actually.
you know what, he says,
i think i will go red today.
thank you.
so glad we ran into each other,
you're as handsome as ever,
still married? he says,
winking and looking me over.
yes, i tell him. i'm very
very married. love her.
absolutely married.
six kids. yup. working on
one more every night.
sometimes in the morning too.

No comments: