girl friends

i used to say

i'd start having children

when i stopped

dating them.

which got a laugh, a sigh,

a groan.

but it was true

for a long time.

over 21, of course,

but immature

women seemed to suit me.

the more

troubled they were,

the more

dysfunctional,

the more needy and 

the bigger the victim, the more

i wanted them in my life.

i could save them

and they could save me.

chaos was home,

starting at birth.

and i kept trying to go back there.

until now.