chat with God

i drag myself into church
for a long talk
with the almighty.
St. Bernadette's is right next
door, talk about guilt,
so I walk over.

what the hell is up?
i ask out loud, although I
figure he knows what i'm thinking
so either way, he hears me.

language, the deep growl of
a voice says, language.

sorry.

just wondering, i say,
sitting on the hard pew.

do you mind kneeling, the voice
says. a little respect.

i kneel. fold my hands together
squint towards the altar.

just wondering, what's up?
i need some direction here,
okay?
a clue. a push, a nudge.
come on you've got to give me
something.
i'm dying here. i'm freaking
moses wandering the desert
for 40 years.

you'll be okay, the voice says.
stop worrying, stop ruminating,
stop thinking about things
you have no control over. relax.

easy for you to say, i tell Him.

what? a little snarky this morning,
aren't we.

no, no. just weary, that's all.
i mean you're so quiet and mysterious
all the time. i'm tired and lost.

hey. all of you are. it's what you
people do.

you people?

yes. you people are exhausting sometimes.

let me think about your
situation and i'll get back to you,
okay? i'm glad you stopped by though.
meanwhile. stay out of trouble, and drop
]a few bucks in the basket on your
way out.

that's it? that's all you got?

i hear a roar of thunder, the pew shakes
and trembles under my feet. candles
flicker.
okay, okay. easy does it.
i'll wait.

patience, my dear boy, patience.
how about you do nothing for a change.
stop reading all those self help books.
get busy with life, or get busy dying.

hey, you stole that from Shawshank.

pardon? who do you think put that line
in the writer's head? it's all mine.
I've got the whole world in my hands.
just like the song goes.

what about the devil and all this evil
going on?

okay. we're getting in pretty deep here.
but don't worry about him.
his day will come. once again, patience.
there is a season for all things.

now off you go, mass is coming up.
don't you have hoops this morning at eleven?