myself
with telemarketers, scammers
from india.
they call five or six times
everyday warning me about
my amazon account,
social security fraud
and microsoft hacking.
i do the old man voice,
in a wheel chair,
unable to find my wallet,
which is in the laundry
room, down three flights
where i have to take the elevator.
or the kate hepurn voice.
shaky and slow.
i drag it on as long as i can,
making dinner, folding clothes,
doing yoga stretches.
they beg for my numbers,
my age, my name, my credit
cards. i make them all up.
it never ends well.
they curse and scream, so
i throw at them a few hindi
curse words i've learned from other
you tube videos.
it's all fun and games and
then i get bored with that too
and just don't answer the calls
anymore.
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