your kids are swell

your children bug
me. they aren't mine,
so it's okay. i mean
i'm glad that i met
them, that you
brought them over
to meet me and all.
don't get me wrong,
i love kids, i have
one of my own. he
has a job though and
lives in new york city.
we even talk on
the phone once in
awhile. but it's great
that you have some
too. what are they
six, and eight? i
really do enjoy their
company, they just
seem sticky and loud
and annoying all
the time. no reflection
on you, i'm sure you've
done the best that
you can do. but they keep
backing up the toilets
and spilling things
on my rug, and pulling
the dog's tail. why
does that one have
a knife? and the other
one is writing on
my wall, could you
please put them
into your mini-van
and drive them away
now. thanks. dinner
on saturday, alone?
just me and you? okay.
bring the stain remover.