the new sanctuary city

the city has become a sanctuary

city.

anyone can come

and hide out.

no one will touch you

if you're

a drug dealer

or murderer,

or just here illegally

coming over or under

the fence

along the border.

we have churches and schools

where you can live

in underground shelters,

and lie low

until the heat is off.

car jackings are permissible,

as are

kidnappings

and sex trafficking.

looting, no problem here.

we will protect your rights.

but in addition to that,

stray birds and wildlife

are now included in

the sanctuary policy.

rabies, no problem,

chickens with the bird flu,

come on in.

bats that have escaped

the wang fu lab

in China, fly on over.

vultures looking for an easy

meal, step right up

and make your nest on

the tallest building you

can find.

black bears 

and poisonous snakes

are welcome.

as are displaced coyotes

and beavers looking for

trees to gnaw down.

come one come all,

we love you.

we want to be your safe

and secure town.