the constitution
and gives me his take on the first
and second amendments
in excruciating detail.
he's drinking the kool aid
of CNN 24/7, NPR and his
socialist wife, Tanya, formerly
known as Betty.
i yawn and ask him if he
saw the food channel the other
day when they were making
a pot roast.
he shakes his head and looks
at me.
you don't care do you?
aren't you a patriot? don't you
care about the movement,
the revolution. the times are
changing, he says.
we need to disband the police
and tear down the statues,
burn those offensive books.
i tell him about the flourless
chocolate waffle cake.
how delicate it is, and the best
method of baking it.
are you coming to the march
this saturday, he asks me.
it's for women's rights, gay
rights. people of color rights,
native americans,
animal rights, environmental
rights, and saving the whales.
i can make you a sign, if you'd
like. Oprah is going to be
there, and Dr. Phil's wife.
Beyonce is going to sing
the new national anthem.
i don't know, i tell him.
i'm kind of busy with my new
air fryer and show him
a picture of the onion rings
i made the other day.
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