two dogs in the park

i overheard

two dogs talking at the park

the other day.

long in the tooth,

old dogs.

dogs

who refuse to learn any

new tricks.

remember when,

the one dog said to the other,

when we

ran free with no leash,

no one walking 

behind us with a plastic baggie.

i mean

how embarrassing is that.

there's no privacy anymore.

i never had a shot in 

my life until

i was dognapped and moved

to the city.

heartworms, who cares?

i ate a dead bird the other day

and my owner

went wild.

you'd think i'd shot someone

in cold blood.

we're dogs for 

god's sake. it's what we do.

we eat dead things in the woods.

i'm tired of my owner 

whining about

the cost of every trip to the vet.

it's always 500 hundred

bucks,

no matter what they bring you

in for.

i've had more blood taken

out of me

than a vampire sucks in a year.

hey look,

there's as squirrel, you want that?

nah, i'm good.

you can have him.

ah forget about it.

i wish i had a real bone to chew on,

like in the old

days, a big old T-bone from the butcher.

they gave me

a rubber bone the other day,

what the hell?

how would they like it if

i bought them

a plastic blow up doll to make love to?

it's crazy man.

my owner is a vegan too, i haven't

smelled charred

meat in years.

just shoot me.