dude looks like a lady

on the fourth
of july
you buy a watermelon
and fill it up
with vodka. you
read somewhere
that that's what
ben franklin used
to do while watching
the fireworks
over the river
with his mistress,
lulabelle. a woman
he had met in france
while doing research
on static electricity.
you are feeling
very patriotic and
so make a shirt
out of a giant
american flag. well,
it's more of a
pancho because you
have no sewing skills
to speak of. but
you are ready
for the holiday
with a pack of all
beef hotdogs
and some potato
salad. you light
a sparkler to
get things started,
but let it burn
down too far, mesmerized
by it's sizzle and
bright colors. it burns
the tips of
your fingers, taking
some skin off.
fortunately you have
a tube of neosporin
nearby and a bandage
so you are
good to go. you are able
to hold your insulated
beer can in your left
hand. it feels awkward
at first, but you can
do it. you think about
what soldiers have done
to keep this country
free. so this is nothing.
there are only three
more hours until sunset
and your neck already
hurts from looking up
into the sky. you realize
that you are almost out
of potato chips
and beer and think
about making a run
to the seven eleven,
but you don't want
to lose your spot, it's
a great spot, so you
stay put and turn up
the radio as they do
the countdown of the top
one hundred songs
of the century. 'dude
looks like a lady' is
playing and you turn
it up. number 31 on
the list. you think
about ben franklin.