she admits
she's smoked too much.
but she equates
her impending death
with being
a bad person.
harsh and rude.
i should have been nicer to people
she says, laughing
and
lighting her
next cigarette
with the one she's smoking.
i should have treated all
of my husbands better.
my children.
i feel bad about my cat too.
leaving her alone
like this.
what possibly will
she do?
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