i hate april first

she tells me

on april

first that she's preggo.

we're going to have a baby,

she says,

so start

buying

diapers,

a crib,

a stroller, get ready

for six a.m. soccer games again.

burping

and schoolwork.

doctor's visits

and

crying.

projectile vomit

and 

whooping cough.

it's coming, she says.

i think it's twins.

we're not sure yet, but

i thought i'd let you know.

after i faint,

and wake up with a lump

on my head.

she laughs.

and says april fools.