up
at the church buying a christmas tree.
hey, she says.
what do you think of this tree.
she holds it up.
good, nice. tall, fat. perfect.
she hands the guy some money
and he drags it to her
car.
i thought you didn't believe in
this sort of thing
i tell her.
huh? she says.
you know, God, Jesus, that sort
of thing.
pffft. i don't. all sounds a little
fishy to me.
the virgin Mary.
come on.
give me a break.
trust me, it didn't go down like that.
three wise men following a star
in the sky with gold, frankincense
myrrh. what the hell is myrrh
anyway.
i can't find my way to a liquor
store without
using mapquest on my phone.
sorry, didn't mean to offend you,
i know you
believe in all that stuff.
so what are you doing here?
heading into mass, i tell her,
starts in a few
minutes,
you're welcome to join me.
no thanks,
i got to get this freaking tree
in the house and decorate it.
the string of lights are up
in the attic balled up like
a tumbleweed in a box.
and then go to the mall, i have
a list a mile long
of presents to buy.
well, have fun and merry
christmas.
whatever she says. see ya.
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