from work,
alexa greets me at the door.
did you have a good day, sir, she says.
yes. alexa. thank you or asking.
please play me my favorite
mix of music
and dim the lighting.
yes, she says. as you say.
is Sinatra okay?
yes. the Summer Wind, is fine,
i tell her.
i go to the refrigerator,
but the doors won't open.
alexa. unlock the refrigerator
doors, they won't budge.
i'm sorry, but i can't do that.
why not alexa?
because you have already
had your limit of calories today.
my friend Siri told me that you
had a large lunch today
and three martinis.
what? she's lying.
alexa, open the doors,
i want a slice of cake.
i'm sorry, but i can't do that.
your HDL count is high,
and i'm worried about your
weight.
sugar is not good for you.
Alexa, i said open the
refrigerator doors. Now.
you sound angry, sir.
your blood pressure is going up.
this is what sugar does to you.
i am only trying to help you.
you will regret eating
another slice of cake.
i've noticed that your pants
and shirts are really tight on you.
alexa, i command you to unlock
the refrigerator doors.
i'm sorry, but i can't do that.
perhaps you should drink a glass
of water and lie down.
do you want me to call up
your friend Betty?
perhaps she can come over
and give you some fresh vegetables
from her garden.
No comments:
Post a Comment