the sales pitch

frantic with foam running down his mouth,
my inventor salesman
calls with the good news. your invention
has been approved for patenting. he yells
into the phone.
utility and design, as well as a one
year provisional patent.
isn't that great, he says, rambling
in his used car salesman way.
I can almost see him snapping his red
suspenders over his coffee stained
white shirt.
we are ready to take the next step.
now, here's the fees, here's what
you need to pay, to get this ball
rolling, to get your idea to
our engineers then to the manufacturer
then to the market.
i start to speak, but he cuts
me off and says, hear me out.
here's what you need. one check,
one single check for twenty thousand
dollars. you can use a credit card,
or a cashiers check, or personal check.
but that's it and you my friend
will be a rich man. we are talking
generational money here. your children
your children's children will
benefit from the decision you are
about to make. I let him finally stop
and catch his breath. I can almost
hear his heart beating like a rabbit
through the phone.
that sounds like a lot, I tell him.
no, he says. look at the big picture.
with the money you are making you will
never have to work again. this invention
of yours is a gold mine.
I imagine him at his desk, a finger
playing with the hole in his worn
brown shoe. tapping a pen against
the ball of his foot.
when can I get your check, he says,
with an audible swallow.
we are ready to work with you and
make you a millionaire, this will
surely happen. there's a pause.
let me sleep on it,
I tell him. okay, okay. okay. he
says. I understand, but please remember
we are up against a deadline.
keep that in mind.
borrow the money if you have to.
steal it, cash in your retirement.
sell your car, your blood, donate
a kidney,
do whatever you have to do to get us
that check.
we want this invention to succeed.
think of the people you can help
with this money.
think of those children on tv
with big eyes and bloated bellies,
or those mangy dogs in cages
in north korea.
don't let them down. you could keep
those animals from becoming a sandwich.
for God's sake don't cheat
other's our of what you can do for them.
okay, that's all i'm going to say.
i'll wait for your check, I have to
go now, I have another call coming in.