your stupid relatives

you hate most
of your relatives
except your aunt
betty who is
in a coma, no
fault of her own,
but the rest of
them you could do
without.
they are all
big mouths
and louts for
the most part.
they cheat on
their taxes,
their wives, step
out on their
husbands,
throw trash out
the windows
on the highway.
they eat too much,
drink until
drunk, they tell
bad jokes,
and are prone
to making
inappropriate
noises at
the dinner table.
they chain smoke.
they are
disgusting
and rude, crude
and unsavory.
they haven't
read a single
a book between
them, but it's
christmas
and you are forced
to shake their
hands and hug
them as if
everything
is okay. somebody
please open
a window.