house hunting

the house needed
work, the agent
said, smiling,
standing there
in her bright yellow
jacket, round and
small like a fat
canary in a cage.
some carpet, some
paint, new appliances,
a roof, some land
scaping perhaps, but
i've got a guy for
that, so don't worry,
you'll love
him. but overall,
except for the lack
of closet space and
the leaky basement
and the neighbors
with the pit
bull, and a couple
of pesky squirrels
in the attic, it's
a wonderful
cream puff of a
house that you'll
love for years
and years to come.
if you like to do
handy man work, she
said, looking at me,
and what real man
doesn't, well
put on your tool
belt cowboy and
saddle up. you'll
have weekend projects
until the cows
come home. i looked
at her and shook
my head. nope.
what else you got?