clean up in aisle six

somehow you get stuck
with the task of picking
up a bag of adult
diapers for your sick
uncle who can't
drive anymore.
you get a grocery cart
and begin to slowly
peruse the aisles,
tossing in aspirin
and gum, vicks vapo
rub, things of that
nature. finally,
exhausted from looking
you ask a clerk who
is more than happy to
answer all your questions
about adult diapers.
adult diapers, he says
loudly, thinking
to himself. hmm.
for a man or a woman,
he asks? man you say,
as he rubs his chin.
fat man, skinny?
umm, about my size I
guess, you say, which
makes him wink at you
and nod, thinking that
they are for you.
are you an astronaut
by any chance he says,
laughing. sorry, just
always loved that story
about the ......
you interrupt him, look
I'm sort of in a hurry,
where are they? he loses the
smile, well, sir, he
says. they may be in
the women's hygiene
section. suddenly you have
to go to the bathroom.
that last cup of coffee
wants out. is there a
bathroom in this store,
you ask him, moving your
feet around and putting
your hands inside your
pockets. he looks at you
jumping around. boy, you do
need those diapers don't
you he says. hold on.
he grabs a microphone
from the shelf and yells
out, would someone please
bring me a bag of men's
diapers to aisle 6.
this is an emergency.
aisle 6, a bag of men's
diapers. bring a mop
too. hurry.