dear jimmy

you begin an advice
column for the local paper.
dear jimmy, the first
reader writes. i think
my wife is cheating on
me. she doesn't like to
camp, hunt, fish or drink
beer with me and my
buddies. suddenly she's
gotten into great shape
at the gym and is buying
all new clothes
and lingerie which she
never wears for me.
i am enclosing a photo
of her with this letter
to show you how beautiful
she is. i just wished
she wanted to bowl,
or go down to the shooting
range with me sometimes.
it would bring us closer
together. signed,
mr. worried in georgetown.
you put the letter down
and stare at the photo.
hmmm, you say, then
begin to type.
dear mr. worried, please
have your soon to be
ex wife call me when
the ink dries on your
divorce papers, i think
i need to talk with
her in person.