women's lib

you see a woman
in the safeway
putting cans
of tuna into her
purse and cans of
beans into the pockets
of her long coat. she
makes eye contact
with you and puts
her fingers to
her lips. shhh,
she says. i'm old,
please don't tell
anyone. i can't
go to jail,
my grandchildren
would be horrified.
i wouldn't do
well in prison.
i offer her some
money and she
laughs.
you don't understand,
she says, it's
not about the
money. i have
plenty of money.
i bought this fur
coat at nordstroms
this morning,
it's more about
the system, i'm
tired of the man
keeping me down.
and you say, what
man. and she says.
all men. i hate
men. they control
the world
and all of us
women. and you
mention gloria
steinham, and
cher, hillary
clinton. what about
madonna. and she
says, don't bring
up the bible to me
sonny boy. a bunch
of lousy men wrote
that too and then
steps on my foot
with the heel of her
boot. you yell out,
what the hell lady.
and you're glad
that you have a
whistle on your key
ring. you begin
to blow it and yell
out thief, thief,
as she scampers down
the aisle knocking
over a pyramid of
grapefruit.