not quite the end

there is the funeral,
the wake,
the viewing, the small
gathering
three days before, pot luck.
the larger gathering
the day after.
the speeches,
the eulogy, the photos
displayed.
i'm running out of
things to wear,
and gaining weight.
the invitations keep
coming for the deceased.
a social butterfly
until the end,
which isn't really
the end.
the year later memorial
date has been circled
on the calendar
as well.