computer errors, we fix

I tell the telemarketer
from 'microsoft' to hold on,
i'm just now taking a chicken
out of the oven.
I put him on speaker phone, then
grab the little paint brush
to baste the chicken. that done
I peel a few small red potatoes
in the sink.
okay. I yell towards the phone,
continue with your call.
I am from Microsoft, he says,
my name is Jackson brown,
and we have received notice
of errors on your computer.
if you have visited
any questionable sites,
you may have infected your computer
with terrible mishappenings.
have you visited such sites?
I give out an audible gulp,
and say, well, maybe.
I mean i'm not in a relationship
right now, and well, after a few
gin and tonics...
there is chatter in the background,
other technicians from Microsoft
I assume. please do not worry,
I am here to help you fix it.
I continue basting the chicken
and look in the fridge for more butter.
I put the peeled potatoes into a pot
of water and turn the burner on.
how am I going through
so much butter lately, I say out loud,
scooping out the last of it.
okay, I say to mister brown.,
where are you, by the way?
I am in florida, st. Petersburg.
oh, I say, talking loudly
because the phone is on the shelf
where I won't drop
it into the sink.
I have a sister that lives in
cocoa beach. how's the weather? hot?
lots of lizards in florida,
I add in.
fine, he says. now, please,
are you in front of your computer?
I want to help you.
sure, I say, go on. i'm ready,
sprinkling some pepper
onto the golden brown bird.
I've got my computer right here
in front of me.
okay, he says, hold the control
key, and the shift key,
then press the letter R,
this will allow me access to
your computer screen and then we can
begin to clean up your errors.
should I make stuffing too,
I ask him.
or is that too much?
cranberry sauce?