i love lorrie moore

you fall madly
in love with
the writer lorrie
moore. she is so
brilliant and clever
and you've read all
of her short stories,
but you admit that
you've only skimmed
her novels. you have
a short attention
span, one that you are
sure she would appreciate.
witty people like
you and her are like
that. you get bored
easily with tedious
projects. you google
her, you download
her, you print off
the pictures of her
with her sly smile
and dark, poetic hair.
you don't know why
it seems poetic, but
you want to impress her
with this description
instead of saying
her long black hair.
anyone can write that.
you believe that she
is someone you could
almost be monogamous with.
you put her pictures
all over your house
and reduce one to
laminate and put into
your wallet next to
your library card.
you try to remember
funny and insightful
things she has written
in her books, books
such as Like Life
and then repeat them
during the day at
appropriate moments,
but this is much more
difficult to do than
you first believed.
so instead
you think of writing
her a fan letter, and
then a real letter,
or an e-mail,
or something to show
how much you worship
the ground she walks
on. you wish you could
text her right now.
you'd say, hey girl,
what up?
you think about
sky writing, getting
a crop plane to make
a giant smokey heart
with your name and hers
in the middle or maybe
just your initials
depending on how
much the plane rental
costs. you wonder why
she lives in wisconsin.
does she like cheese
and other dairy products
that much. you could
send her some cheese
maybe. a big cheese
wheel from trader joe's.
maybe a wide selection
of cheeses, both
domestic and international.
you think about hopping
on a freight train a la
boy dylan paying homage
to woody guthrie.
you'd sing songs along
the way with a harmonica
you found in an alley
and then sterilized.
you'd change the lyrics
so that every other
line rhymed with lorrie,
or moore, or both
together. you go to
sleep at night and hope
that she reads this
one day, and calls you
and says yes, i feel
the same way. please,
please come and eat
some cheese with me
in wisconsin, the future
is us.